Well, I've finished out this semester with a 3.8 GPA. That's pretty darn good. Successful semester right? From an academic standpoint, yes.
One thing I've learned from my first semester of college is that you learn so much more than just academics in college. One of the things I've learned is truly how much I need the relationship I have with Jesus Christ.
Throughout the semester he has continued to provide for me and take care of my needs especially when I broke my wrist. He provided people at just the right time to help me and get to doctors to make sure everything healed properly. However, I was not quite as faithful to Him as he was to me. Not that any human ever has been or can truly be as faithful as God is, but I did not even come close.
Long story short, I learned that singing in the choir and going to occasional Bible studies is NOT what helps you maintain a relationship with Jesus Christ. They are certainly helpful, but I must be willing to put forth the effort to seek spiritual nourishment and keep up quiet times. I've learned that without that, no matter how much fun you are having, life feels empty. I knew I needed to read my Bible more often and go to Bible studies that I can offer something to and likewise receive spiritual nourishment from but I did not. I offered the excuse of being busy and having no time, but I knew that was not true.
At the beginning of Christmas break I went on a trip to visit some friends and family in Florida one of which is my cousin Christie. Being with her was like walking with Jesus. I don't know if this was intentional, but she reminded that Jesus just wants to spend time with me and of how much He loves me. To a certain degree it tore me apart because I knew I had neglected Him, but on an incredible level I felt contentment and joy. Even though I had failed to maintain a relationship with Him this semester, He still loves me. Now, all I really want to do is honor Him. I want to live for Him like I never have before.
Even as a Christian, if you have ever felt empty at the end of the day or week or really just the end of anything, I know what you feel like. You try to fill the emptiness with more fun, more friends, and more things in general and in the short term it does relieves the emptiness. But what you truly need is time with Jesus Christ. I've been a Christian for years, but now I more understand what it means to be a Christian. I now love Jesus because of what he did for me and I want everyone to be able to know too! From my background I have a lot of head knowledge about the Bible, but now I have the heart to apply it. I pray that you can too.
I wish I had not strayed, but I pray God can use this testimony for good because I believe he CAN make all things work together for good. My priorities are straight now. God is at the top of my list - right where He needs to be and right where I want Him to be.